It’s the Holidays – But Sh*t Still Happens


Here we are getting ready for the year-end holidays. Thanksgiving is around the corner and Christmas isn’t far behind.

There are so many mixed emotions at this time; so much anticipation. We hope for the positive and pray the negative won’t hit us.

Family dynamics – Will I get it all done? Do I have enough money for gifts? Will everyone get along? It’s so busy already. How am I going to get everything done? How will my family react to my new girlfriend or boyfriend?

Then we’re hit with a real life tragedy – Beirut and Paris, France. I was in Paris maybe 35 years ago. What fun, what beauty and what excitement I experienced on my first trip to Paris. I had the good fortune to assist in workshops in Neims and Paris. I loved the people, the place. I haven’t been to Beirut, but I’m still touched by what they also experienced.

babycryIt feels like another 911 in my heart. It’s hard to reconcile. My heart cries out for what those people are going through. We know it all too well. Our own catastrophe hit us many years ago.

So how do we come to terms with creating amazing holidays and still deal with the reality of what just happened?

Prior to the past couple of events, I was going to put out another list of Holiday Tips. But somehow it doesn’t feel quite so relevant at the moment. Every time I watch the news, I am hit by the event, the images, the people, the suffering. I have all these mixed emotions jumbled together in my body. It really doesn’t feel so good.

I have a hunch many of you are going through a mixture of feelings as well. It just shows that life is a bit of a rollercoaster; even when it is supposed to be the happiest time of the year.

Here are some tips to help cope with the ups and downs during the holiday season:

  • Focus on what is important. If your family or friends are most important to you, then focus on them. Let go of being the perfectionist or trying to please Aunt Tilly. Take some time to meditate on what you most want to feel and experience during the holidays. For me, it’s love and connection with my family and friends. Focus on the love, the warmth, peace and JOY you want to feel. Once you’re clear on what is significant for you, the other priorities can more easily fall into place.
  • Take really good care of you by loving you. The stress of the holidays can take its toll– traveling, cooking, cleaning, buying the right gifts, bringing the right food to events, getting the cards done (I’ve given that one up.) Allow yourself the privilege of doing things good enough, not perfect — just good enough for now. If you have that connection with your people, they won’t care so much about the details and perfection. Get plenty of rest, eat healthy for your body most of the time, eat the right amount for you (you already know how terrible it feels when you overeat.)
  • Balance you. Make sure to leave time for those special activities that keep you feeling balanced.

Do something for your body like yoga, exercise, dancing or running. Do a physical activity daily even if it’s only 5 minutes walking around the block or jogging in place. It gets the endorphins going, which will keep you in a better mood the rest of the day.

Include something for your mind and emotions such as releasing those negative and lower level thoughts, beliefs and events that will have you overreacting from past events instead of being in the present, in the NOW. There are numerous techniques for transforming emotions and beliefs: hypnosis, EFT, visualizations to name a few.

Remember to do something for your spirit. Take the time to go inside and realize what the holidays actually mean for you. What do you want to bring forth this holiday? How do you want to affect those around you? Energy is contagious and affects those around you. Decide what energy and feeling you want to bring to the events you attend at this time. Meditate, mindfulness meditation, pray, chant, yoga, spirit dance, do a ritual, blessings – Do whatever it is that takes you to a loving, deep place inside you. Then from that loving depth of beauty that is truly you, share that feeling wherever you go.

  • To turn around negative anticipation for the holidays, tragedies and anything in life, deal with your own Shadow, your own dark side. So what do I mean by the Shadow? The holiday shadow would be any negative feelings coming up for you such as anger, irritation, resentment, dislike or even hatred regarding anyone you may see or think about at a holiday event. That negative energy will affect that person or persons so they react to your energy even if you do not express it verbally.

For example, if you, your sister, or anyone have had a big disagreement and it is still not over between you, it is up to you to get to what wound underneath got triggered, what part of you is still holding on to that emotion, release the emotion and decide what emotion you would rather feel. Once you release the negative emotion, fill yourself up with the positive emotions you choose to experience.

That may sound strange to some of you, but I can assure you it works. It may not work in a day or two, but over time it will.

There are times before family events, I will meditate and do a healing on me for at least a half an hour in order to transform my emotion. It is up to you to choose how you want to feel during this time.

  • Send prayers and blessings to those going through difficulties, suffering or tragedies of any kind. Your prayers and blessings make a difference. It has been scientifically proven. Let us all send prayers to those who have lost a person or were injured in any way from these tragic events or any personal tragedy. Focus on what you feel grateful for at this time. It adds to the prayers and blessings.

laughterIt’s even more imperative that we focus on creating the love and peace we desire from the deepest place in our own hearts.

I know it’s easy to go to hating those who created this tragedy, but I want to remind you.


Helaine Harris

So if you truly want to make a difference, then focus on sending love, peace, harmony and blessings to everyone, everywhere. Reach out wherever you are to bring harmony, peace and a smile.

May you have a delightful and enriching Thanksgiving experience.

Love, Peace, Harmony and JOY!

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